Video Game Sandwich

Mmm, shoot the jay indeed. 2k Sports’ Basketball franchise is like the cool older brother to EA’s NBA Live series. The younger tyke might have all the savvy of a more hip sibling; listening to all the most current jams and dressing all fly and what not. But dammit, the boy just don’t have the knowledge! He does not possess that sensibility of the game that comes with extended maturity. That much has been apparent, and NBA 2k6 is one of the few Achievement Whoring titles that it hasn’t completely pained me to play through. Ironically, however, it was also the easiest, and you can max out the game’s 1000 achievement points within the space of a single game.

Now, if you’ve read any other of my Whoring articles then you’ll know I’m not the most American Sports-savvy guy this side of the Atlantic ocean. I play the games, sure, but you ask me to explain the rules and merely I’ll stand idle, cross-eyed, like a toddler who’s just filled his diapers. Fortunately a lot of the business involved with my NBA 2K6 success was reasonably straight-forward. I know what a rebound is, and I’ve scored a few three-pointers of my own (takes sharp, self-indulgent breath in) so the rest is elementary. I was quite stumped over the concept of this Triple-Double business, however. That, to me, sounds like a paralytic measure of alcohol. Or a special kind of hamburger, designed with the sole intention of giving you heart disease. The former I could quite possibly handle, but the latter is something I’d like to avoid for a few years yet. Of course, with some research I managed to figure out that a Triple-Double was achieved when a player scores 10 or more of three different statistics (10 points - 10 assists - 10 rebounds, e.t.c.)

As I’ve mentioned, all of this can be achieved in the space of a single game if you’re a sharp enough player. Go into the options and mess around with the sliders to give yourself an incomprehensible advantage over the opposition (bump up those 3 pointers, and rebounds), set the quarter lengths to 7 minutes or more, and then when it comes to team select go with the Easter All-Stars as Shaq will be your man for the Triple-Double.

This process takes all of about 30-45 minutes. I had to use two games to get the job done, but that’s only because I’m certifiably mentally retarded when it comes to basketball titles; you’ll likely do it in one.

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